Is it really so difficult to be content with your life? There is always something that could be better and instead of focussing on the good, we always focus on what we think is missing.
I have a good job, I am doing what I trained hard to do. I know its very difficult in these times to be able to say that, jobs are hard to come by and especially good jobs. I am immensely grateful each day that I am able to say I have a good job and that I am also good and what I do.
Secondly - I have an amazing family and friends. After living away from everyone for 18 months, words cannot describe the feeling of being close to everyone again. I love that live so close to my family and friends and I love that my social life is existent again when for so long my life was work and nothing else.
I am thankful for the above I really am, I consider myself lucky. Life can often be sectioned into 3 main areas - work, house, love. I have 3 out of 3. I have my job, I have my own place and I have the love of my family and friends. However I am missing one thing from the love section. Something that the majority of my friends have and that I am lacking. A partner, a boyfriend. At 28 I don't really consider myself old and I am aware that love happens when you least expect it.
I've dabbled in online dating and for most of the time I am very happy being single. I am confident with who I am and really I know that I don't need anyone else to 'validate' me as such. However on the back of another failed attempt at romance - I cant help but feel sub-par. I had good feelings about this guy. it was the first time in goodness knows how long that I thought something 'could' happen here. Alas he has met someone else and was totally upfront about it, this is a good quality. I appreciate this honesty, lets face it at this early stage of our romance - he didn't owe me that.
So here I am, weighed down by the fact I was essentially rejected by someone I have known for 3 weeks, really wondering what it is about me that seems to be unattractive to the opposite sex. My last serious relationship was 4 years ago and in that time my ex has managed to find someone and marry them. What have I done? Yes I could say that I have been busy building the other aspects of my life, but now that I am settled back home, with a good job and a lovely home I would just love to have someone else to share it with. Is that too much to ask?
Is it too much that this has warranted its own blog self deprecating blog post?
